15 Systems that support an elegant lifestyle

When I first started running my home, I had no idea what I was doing. I was a young mom and it seemed like there was always a mess, always a bill that needed to be paid, always a birthday that I missed. Add the fact that I was also working full time and it was a recipe for disaster. This is the norm for most of us though. We typically lead very busy lives which can make it difficult to manage everything that needs to be done.

Becoming a classier version of yourself is removing the chaos from your life so you can be softer and more relaxed.

I remember one day I decided to create a cleaning schedule so I wouldn’t feel like I needed to clean the entire house every day. It looked a little something like this

• Monday > Bathrooms
• Tuesday > Bedrooms
• Wednesday > Living room
• Thursday >Hallways and entry
• Friday > 5-10 minute clean of whatever needed attention
• Saturday > REST
• Sunday > Kitchen

Additionally, I decided that the last week of each month I would deep clean those areas of the home. This way the weekly cleaning was just maintaining.

This system worked SO well! It relieved my stress, gave structure to my cleaning schedule, and also helped with the kids also, instead of hearing me telling them to clean their room all the time, they knew that they only had to do it once per week. They also knew what to expect and therefore they didn’t feel the need to complain anymore. They knew I was cleaning my room as well.

The deep clean at the end of the month also made my life ten times easier. Removing old food from my refrigerator and wiping it down ensured that it was always clean, and I also knew exactly what I needed when I went grocery shopping.

After the first month, I printed this schedule and laminated it so that it was made official in my house.

It was then that I discovered that the secret to having an organized life is to create systems

1. Cleaning system

I figured I would list this one first since I’ve already given a pretty solid example of how a cleaning system works. This will look different for everyone, and largely depends on your work schedule and how easy it is to maintain on a weekly basis. The good news is that if you do your monthly deep clean, it should only take you a few minutes per day to clean these areas of your home.

2. Finance system

Finances can be very complex. And since everything is expensive and many things are on subscriptions, it is very important to organize your finances and create a system for your money so that you don’t find yourself wasting it unnecessarily.

Personally I have a budget app and I also have a list in my reminders app on my iphone of all of the bills that I have to pay each month along with the dates they are due.

Every Sunday I visit the checklist and make sure the bills are paid. I have been doing this for years and it has really worked for me. Do whatever works best for your and your financial situation.

3. A scheduling system

Your calendar should be the place where your life lives—not something you only check when you’re trying to remember what you’re supposed to be doing. Add your appointments, birthdays, social plans, work commitments, deadlines, trips, and important dates all in one place.

Then create recurring reminders for the things you tend to forget, like scheduling appointments, paying bills, changing filters, or checking in with someone. Once a week, take 10–15 minutes to look ahead and plan your priorities. When your schedule is organized, you spend less time scrambling and more time actually enjoying your life.

At the beginning of the week, make sure to review your calendar so you know exactly what you need to do in the days ahead. This is also important if you need to cancel appointments as well. If you are actively managing your calendar you will likely be able to cancel early enough to avoid being charged a cancelation fee.

4. A Birthday System

Do your best to add your everyone’s birthday in their contact on your phone as soon as you learn it. This way you never have to ask when it is.

Keep birthdays in your calendar and set reminders weeks ahead. Maintain a list of gift ideas throughout the year so you’re not panic-buying something at 9 p.m. the night before someone’s birthday. Being thoughtful becomes much easier when you have a system for it. I have missed so many birthdays because I didn’t have a system in place.

Additionally, add dates in your calendar for when you actually need to have the birthday card mailed out. For me I try to have my cards mailed out 5 business days before their birthday.

5. A meal system

Another system I set up early in my adult life. I heard someone say that being an adult is just trying to figure out what to eat for dinner every year for the rest of your life. I deeply resonated with this because I felt like I was constantly trying to figure out what to eat and it was exhausting.

To simplify it, I made a theme for dinners

• Monday > Italian
• Tuesday > Tacos or (mexican)
• Wednesday > Chicken
• Thursday > Shrimp
• Friday > Takeout or a casserole
• Saturday > Pizza, Burgers, something easy and fun
• Sunday > Fish

Over the years I have learned lots of recipes that I can use for each of these themes. I have all of these meals listed and I can easily choose what I want. I keep it all in a binder and I keep recipes in this binder as well. It has made meal planning SO much easier. It also makes grocery shopping easier as well!

6. The life binder

Have one secure place for important information you might need: insurance details, account information, important documents, warranties, medical records, household information, etc. You don’t want to spend three hours searching for a document when you suddenly need it.

I use a simple binder for this, and it holds all of my important information. This has saved me dozens of times over the years when I need important documents for things. I keep everything important in here from my marriage license to receipts for jewelry and larger purchases. Some people keep their entire home management system in a binder, but I only use it for important documents and I have separate binders for other things.

7. The monthly reset system

This started with my deep cleaning system and then it turned into a full on life reset at the end of each month. It really helps me prepare for the month ahead and prevents me from getting stressed out. Once a month, step back and look at your entire life. I like to ask myself these questions at the end of each month:

• What’s coming up?
• What needs attention?
• What have you been avoiding?
• What needs to be cleaned, canceled, scheduled, purchased, organized, or completed?
• Think of it as your monthly meeting with yourself.

I actually have an entire post just for the monthly reset if you want more details.

8.Wellness system

I am addicted to working out. I really am. After 7 plus years of going to the gym multiple times per week, I have finally settled on a routine and workouts that give me insane results, and also get me excited to workout. Not only do I have a workout that I love, but I also have created a healthy diet that I love and that I actually stick to.

All because I took the time to create a proper wellness plan. I don’t just go to the gym and hope for the best, I put in the work that will change my body.

If you want to create a wellness system, you have to create something that works with your schedule so that you will be motivated to make it happen.

9. A Social system

The other day, I went to my very first book club meeting. It is held by a local bookstore owner and we met at a brewery near my house. I had a wonderful time.

At the end of the meeting, someone asked when the next book club is. The owner responded with “The second Thursday of every month”. This immediately made everyone’s life easier. There is no worrying when the next meeting will be, this is a standing event and it will also be at the same location. This is perfect for system lovers like myself.

A beautiful social life usually doesn’t happen accidentally. Instead of constantly saying, “We need to get together sometime,” actually put plans on the calendar. Schedule the brunch, plan the girls’ night, book the day trip, make the reservation, and send the invite. If there’s someone you’ve been meaning to see, reach out and make an actual plan instead of leaving it as a vague idea. Being intentional about your social life makes it easier to stay connected, create memories, and make time for the people who matter to you.

10. A wardrobe system

If you are constantly feeling like you have nothing to wear, this is because you don’t have a system for your wardrobe. This also means that shopping is probably an overwhelming nightmare because there is no structure. Find what colors look good on you. Find what silhouettes are flattering. Learn and remember your sizes for each brand so ordering online is easier. This is how you create a wardrobe system that makes your life easier when it is time to get ready.

11. An elegance system.

Elegance becomes much easier when you have a few personal standards and go-to habits you can rely on. Keep a list of conversation starters for moments when you’re meeting someone new or the conversation needs a little help, have a few elegant outfits you can always count on when you want to look polished, and establish the manners you never compromise on.

Maybe you always greet people warmly, put your phone away during conversations, send a thank-you text after being hosted, or remember to introduce people properly. Create your own collection of etiquette rules and personal standards that you follow consistently when you’re out in the world. The goal isn’t to perform elegance—it’s to make thoughtful, graceful behavior so natural that you don’t have to think about it.

12. The Seasonal reset system

At the beginning of each season, give yourself a little life reset. Put away clothes from the previous season and bring out pieces that fit the new one, refresh your home with a few seasonal touches, clean out old beauty and personal-care products, and take a look at the goals you want to focus on.

Then make a seasonal bucket list filled with things you want to do, places you want to visit, foods you want to try, and memories you want to make. A seasonal reset gives you a chance to pause, reassess, and intentionally step into a new chapter instead of letting the months blur together. It makes each season feel like something to experience—not just something that happens to you.

13. The Digital Organization System

Your phone is part of your environment too, so keeping your digital life organized can make a surprisingly big difference in how calm and put-together you feel. Take time to organize your photos, delete old screenshots, clear out emails, clean up your notes, arrange your apps, and create folders for important files and documents.

Unsubscribe from emails you never read and remove apps you no longer use. You don’t need to have a perfectly curated phone, but you should be able to find what you need without scrolling through hundreds of screenshots or searching endlessly for an important document. An elegant life shouldn’t feel chaotic every time you unlock your phone.

14. A command center

Have you ever received something in the mail that happens to be important and then you misplace it ? This is because you don’t have a home for your mail and other documents to live before they are filed away. I have a system for this and let me tell you how it works.

I have a paper tray with two shelves. Top is for new papers and bottom is for papers that need to be filed away.

When I receive something in the mail, I will put it in the top tray. This is where it lives until I file it away. When the day comes, I scan all of the papers into my computer and name them accordingly. This means I can go back later and quickly search for it if I need it. I will write ‘scanned’ on the paper and either file it away immediately or put it on the bottom tray with the rest of the scanned items.

Having this system has been a game changer. There are so many bills and important documents that need to be stored away but also easily accessible. I remember one time shortly after purchasing my (dream) car, the bank called me and said they were missing a document from me and they needed me to send it over.

Lucky for me, I had already scanned and labeled this document into my computer so all I had to do was open the file and email it. There was no stressing about where the file went. It was ready to go. I also back everything up on an external hard drive in case something happens to my computer as well.

15. The gifting system.

We’ve all been there before. Shopping for a gift on the way to a party. Signing the card in the car before we go inside. Frantically trying to figure out what this person would want. This is because most people don’t have a system for gifting.

Now, I have cards, gift bags, wrapping paper, gift cards, and small gifts pre purchased and in my closet so that when it is time to mail out a card or give a gift, I already have it. I love doing this because I now love to shop for cards. I try my best to purchase them at small local stores, bookstores, or on my travels to make them more sentimental.

The Elegant Life Isn’t an Effortless Life

This is the part I think is worth emphasizing in the post: Elegant women aren’t magically less busy, less messy, or less overwhelmed than everyone else. They simply don’t expect themselves to hold their entire lives together through memory and motivation.

They create systems.